Melvin was retrenched and has been out of the job for 3 months. Now that he got a son to feed, I think life must be very tough on him.

I know him.

He likes to keep silent about almost everything. As a friend, I think I ought to help him. Since he can't secure an interview, probably got to do with his resume.

Let me help you, MELVIN NG.

Attach appropriate photo of yourself to the different job opening is important.



If you keep sending your resume with the above photo, it won't help you in your cause. I mean what is this? Drinking coke, grinning away and that's it?

You got to be kidding me.
Let's get started.

Post: Apply for elite office job

Melvin listen up, if you apply for a elite office job like management level, please attached your photo with a long shelves shirt with a tie. Comb your hair neatly, and have a “on the ball” look.

Like this,



(Must look smart and have on the ball face)


Post: Apply for skilled worker

If you apply for a skilled worker like engineers, make sure you dress neatly and a test-pen tuck somewhere in your shirt to show how serious you are in your work.

Like this,



(Shirt tuck with a test-pen is a MUST)


Post: Apply for semi-skilled worker

If you apply for semi-skilled worker like technician, just make sure your test-pen can be seen.

Like this,



(Same theory but t-shirt will do if apply for technician)


Post: Apply for domestic houseworker

If you apply for domestic houseworker no need overdress, this will put off your future employer. Just attached a photo with you doing some housework. Remember to put in your CV, “I'm very good with ironing.”

Like this,



(Smile as if you love doing housework. Oh yes, smile with your iron next to you)


Post: Apply for model

Let say, you wanted to be a model. Just a photograph will not may enough to impress. Put few photographs. Remember to unbutton your shirt to have same effect. If either your interviewer is old maid or a gay, you half way there.

Like this,





(Show some skin of your. If your future interviewer is Lau kuay bu, you hit jackpot. If gay, also jackpot but remember to bring along KY)


Post: Apply for vcd seller

If you apply for post of a vcd seller for example like in the Pasar Malam, your resume be describe how Beng you are. In your work history you must brag how you worked as handphone sellers , mechanics , car washer , sell vcd / dvd before.

Your vocabulary in your CV must limited to ccb, knn or kan bei. Attached photo like this attach somewhat crude would greatly enhance your chance.

Like this,


<
(Legs must be up to boost your outcome)

So far, so good?
Roger boh, Melvin?


Post: Apply for security guard

Let's just say in a worst scenario, you apply for a security guard. What do you do? I mean what kind of photo you put yourself into?

Well, Singh is well known their bravery. Many goldsmith used to engaged them as guard in the olden days. So you wear a turban in your photo. As simply as that!

Like this,



(Join the trade, wear turban)


Post: Apply for terrorist

Ok.....you think you want an overseas job.
You want challenge.
You want high pay.
You willingly to risk it all.

And you apply for terrorist. What kind of photo will you attach in your CV? That's the million dollar question.

In your photo you must look aggressive and very violet person. After all, your future employers share the same hobby as your. This should be most easy of all. Just be one of them.

Like this,




(Put in your CV, you must state that your fave slogan is "Kill one and frighten 10000")

If you follow my instruction, surely you get a job in no time. Hope it help you Melvin. Always glad to help you.

I'll been waiting for you good news, happy job hunting!
.

I went on a shopping spree today. First stop was Rocher centre to have our breakfast. Bak kut teh and some dim sum was on the menu.

Time: 12:00pm
Crowd: Mob scene
Appetite: High



Went to Bugis, main objective was to buy a digital camera. Brought myself a Nikon Cool pix 7900 and a 1GB SD memory card.

Spec
7MP resolution
3x optical Zoom-Nikko lens with ED elements (38-114mm equiv.)
In-Camera Red-Eye Fix
D-Lighting (in-camera shadow lightening)
Post-shot Blur Warning
16 scene modes
14MB internal memory
640x480 pixel, 30fps movie mode
Best Shot Selector - takes a series of shots and chooses the sharpest for you
White Balance and exposure bracketing


This cool 7.1mp camera costs me only SGD399/- and SGD38 for the 1GB SD memory card. What a bargain!

Next we went to Great World to buy oven as mum once again wanted to return to kitchen. Once upon a time, she can bake cake, cookies, roasting chicken and etc. Now, I'm not too sure.



Within 15 minutes, we decided on this oven


Now with the oven back home....can't wait for mum to use it.
I think I'm gonna be fat....real soon.
.

You know one of the best motivational quote I like is,....

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life.
(Click on it to hear the song)

If I'm down, unhappy I would sing myself this song. Never fail to work wonder on me. I hope this song will have the same effect on you guys too.

Remember
Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistle]

Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]

If the above song not working, fear not.
Check the video below....

Like I said, always look on the bright side of life!

From the Strait Times

Nov 7, 2006
$60 fee for IC replacement is actual cost

I REFER to the letter 'Charge a lower fee to replace old ICs' by Mr Steven Cheow Chin Seng (ST, Oct 26).

Singapore Citizens and Permanent Residents are required by law to register for NRICs at 15 years and re-register at 30. The registration fee is $10 for citizens and $50 for PRs. The NRICs issued during registration and re-registration are subsidised.

The replacement cost for a damaged identity card is not subsidised. The $60 fee for replacing a damaged identity card is the actual production cost. The fee has not been increased since April 1, 1999. We assure Mr Seow that we are prepared to consider waiving the fee in cases that warrant special consideration. He highlighted the need to deter NRIC holders from losing their cards. This is reflected in the higher replacement fees for a lost NRIC, at $100 for the first loss and $300 for subsequent losses.

Lim Jing Jing (Ms)
Senior Public & Internal Communications Executive
for Commissioner, Immigration & Checkpoints Authority

----------------------------------------------------

I say,

Just a week ago, I changed my ATM with UOB. The smart chip is embedded in the card. High tech card can use it to withdraw in other countries and it cost me FREE of charge.

At SGD60.00, I can buy myself a DVD re-writer. It contains many parts, technology for playing DVD movie as well as burn movie/data into a disk. Also at SGD60.00 for the dvd re-writer, it include shipping cost, earning for the company and most important profit for the vendor.

At SGD60.00, I can buy myself almost a 2GB thumbdrive. It combines flash memory technologies and encryption technologies with the ubiquitous USB connection to create a self-contained and highly secured drive and media package the size of a thumb. At this price, both distributor and vendor can still make money.

At SGD60.00, I can buy myself a bluetooth AP + Router. No need for me to introduce the wonder it has to offer and the convenience.

At SGD60.00, I can buy myself a 80GB\7200rpm harddisk. Surely it has to cost more than a card.

AT SGD60.00 is enough to buy many packs of chicken rice and maybe even dissuade someone from jumping into the the MRT track.

How come it cost SGD60.00 just to produce our identify card?
How come the cost is high?

Best part was it says we are required by law to re-register at 30.

Kanna spot check so many times, my IC still have my 20 years ago photo how come police never ask me to change?

So many questions....I know I never get any answer.
.

I' m sure you know what is a Nigeria scam, unfortunately some people still fall for it.

Why?
Easy money and greed.

Last time I got email from this scam, I always duly reply. This time I decided to post on my blog and my reply to them.
(By the way, it been a day since and they didn't me)

I cut short the email and posted only relevant content.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FROM STANLEY AND LINDA TABOH.
Avenu 12 Rue 47 ABIDJAN
DANANI REFUGEE CAMP, ABIDJAN
REPUBLIC OF COTE-D'IVOIRE
TEL:+225 07196613.
Please reply to this email address (stanley_taboh2@yahoo.fr)

Dear ,

We are Stanley and Linda the children of Late General Malick Taboh the former Director of military intelligence and special acting General Manager of the Sieria Leone Diamond mining coperation( SLDMC ). We are contacting you to seek your good assistance to transfer and invest USD 8.5 million belonging to our late father which is deposited in a bank here in Abidjan.

Before our mother died, she told us that our father deposited some money which he made from diamond sales and contracts in a bank here in Ivory Coast and that we should pray and find a trust worthy foreign business partner who would help us to transfer and invest this money in profitable business venture overseas.

She gave us the bank document to prove the deposit and then told us that our father used my name as the only son to deposit the money in the bank. She told us that this is the reason why we came to Ivory Coast. My mother died afterwards.

I have gone to the bank to make inquires about this money and I spoke with the Manager of International remittance however, the manager is very concerned because of our age. I am 25 years why my younger sister is 21 years and as such advised that we should look for a matured person that will represent me at the bank.

If you are willing to assist us, please let us know immediately so that you will arrange the transfer of the money to your account with the bank. Please note that we will offer you 10% of the total money as compensation for your noble assistance in accordance. with my mothers advise.

Please there is urgent need for the money to be transferred to your account because of the political crises they are having in Cote d'Ivoire now. We are hoping to hear your urgent response.

Thank you and may God bless you and your dear family.

Yours sincerely
Stanley and Linda Taboh.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Too small to read? My reply is below)

(My reply to them in Blue)


Hi Stanley and Linda,

My name is Mr Kan Ni Na Bu and I have just read your email. Your proposal is very interesting. It comes just a right time, as I really needed money for my movie.

You see I am a self director, self producer and actor as well for my own porn movie. It's tough when you need to have sex with a few women in a day....for the whole week, you should know what I mean.

By the way is your sister interested in becoming a porn actress?
Great prospect, I tell you.

Anyway, back to our business shall we.

First I don't understand why the bank manager is very concerned because of your age. You said you are 25 years, right? In my country, you can have sex at age 16 years. I became a father of two at the age of 18 years old. I think you must be too soft spoken in your approach when dealing with the bank manager.

Son, I shall give you some pointers.
- Talk loudly to bank manager as if you are shouting
- Threaten him with foul language if necessary.
- If the bank manager still not impress, bring a cactus plant and slap him with it.

This, I believe should wake up his bloody idea.

I have a great idea how you use your 8.5 millions. Invest in my porn production! With your money, and your sister as porn actress and I, of course the leading actor cum director ......we will make it BIG, I promise you.

Waiting for your reply.

Your best friend
Mr Kan Ni Na Bu

----------------------------------------------
Hopefully I get a reply from this scammer and I will post on my blog for you to see.

Let's us cross our finger.
.

My dad has been working tirelessly at the Singapore action group of elders (SAGE) for 30 years.

Established since 1977, the Singapore Action Group of Elders (SAGE) is a non-profit, non-religious and multi-ethnic Voluntary Welfare.

Although now dad has retired but he still make his daily trip back to the place. And dad is 74 years old this year.

Mum, sister and my brother in law visit my dad. Our last visit to SAGE which was situated at Toa Payoh was more than a years ago. The place was fund by donation only without government support as a result the place was badly run down.


(Entrance to SAGE)

This place is neglected condition because with little or no donation from the public, SAGE is unable to sustain the maintenance of this building.


(It is a far cry from it heyday back in 1977 to 1999.)


(Now it so deserted it feel like a ghost town)


(Now only occasion, a handful of group of people drop by to play table tennis)


(My dad's office table)

The reason my dad office table still there since he already retired is that my dad had a godson. He has rented a room there and put all dad's stuff.

If not, the management would throw all my dad's belonging out. Everyday, my dad's godson would fetch him from house to office and back home again.

Talk about filial piety, he would beat all of my siblings including me hand down.


(Dad talking with my sister)



Let me show you something very interesting. It is a old photo of my dad taken in 1960.



Guess which on is my dad?



Guess again.
A hint is that I bear a mirror image of my younger dad.



Of all my sibling, I have striking close resemble.
Really, like looking at myself.


(So I may look like my dad when I'm 70 years old next time. Haha)

Another thing worth mention is the refrigerator.



Mum brought this refrigerator in 1969. When we shifted to Pasir Ris, this fridge was brought over here. The side rubber is old and musty, nevertheless it still work.


(Brand is Pan Electric)

Almost 40 years of usage this fridge was still a good working order! Sadly to say, these days they don't build fridge like they used to anymore.

On our way back home, I saw this in Toa Payoh.



On 22 Oct, I wrote my about my childhood. Somehow I couldn't find picture of the playground got dragon thing with roll of steps. Haha...I found it.

I can't resist....it has been almost 30years since I last climb one of these thing.


(30 years later: It never to old to have fun again)


(Just like the good old days)


(After I "played", my sister also climb on the DRAGON)

Goodness me.....it is still fun!
.

I almost forget about his matter. You see, some times ago I was in this pub, talking to this pretty gal, her dressing and hair-style like those trendy Japanese kids back in the Land of the Rising Sun.

She proudly show me her mobile phone, there was a picture that she and her partner kissing. Nothing wrong right....however her BF is a female. She admitted that she is a lesbian.

Just then her BF (butch) came into the pub.
They embraced each other and kiss.

You guys will think what a TURN ON experience to see 2 girls kiss in front of you “live” some more?

Wrong.......
I swear to God. I even had a friend check my inside pants; there's no movement whatsoever. And you would think that I'd be turned on?

You see, for butch lesbians they have short hair. They wear sports bras underneath to flatten out their chests. They don't wear makeup. They wear men's jeans. They don't have high pitched voices. They wear tennis shoes and boots.

In other words, they look like men, ugly wannabe men.

And don't get me wrong: there's nothing that would make me happier than to see Fiona Xie doing with Erica Lee. Wow! That's was some hot lesbian action.

Lesbians are the NOT the same chicks you see in porno. In fact, those chicks in the movie aren't even lesbians at all.

Now, I've seen the lesbian reality, been surrounded some lesbians, some of whom were drunk, grinding up against and making out with each other.....

I found out...it is fucking turn-off.
.

The Scorpion and the Frog

The story is about a scorpion asking a frog to carry him across a river as scorpion can't swim.

The frog is afraid to be stung, but the scorpion reassures him that they would both die if that happened. The frog then agrees, but in mid-river the scorpion stings him nevertheless, telling him that it is simply his nature to do so.

This story is often quoted to illustrate the purportedly unsuppressed nature of one's self at its base level.

Moral of the story is, don't ever trust or believe a Siao ren. Just like do not fart if you are trapped in a confined space.

They are Siao ren, they cannot and will not suppress their destructive impulses, even when they have nothing to gain by acting on them. Trust me, I'm working alongside with a Siao ren.

I know.
.

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/238456/1/.html

SINGAPORE: Westbound train services between Queenstown and Jurong East MRT stations were disrupted after a man was hit by a train, and died, at Clementi MRT station.

SMRT says buses were provided for about 11,700 passengers who were affected by the disruption.

This incident comes almost two weeks after a similar death at the Chinese Gardens MRT.

Police have classified the death as an unnatural one and are investigating. -CNA
-----------------------------------------------------------

Thanks to the donation to the family which is been reported out, Singaporeans are encourage people to jump for the well being of their family.

Now it is monkey see........ monkey do.



Once you jump, make sure newspaper come out, your family will get one lump sum better than buying insurance. Everyday there is at least one suicide in Singapore, but not reported.

Very sad to see this type of thing becoming a trend.



On the more serious note, I presume this jumper is another out of job, poor and in debt. I rarely see someone rich committing suicide that because there there is too much to lose. If one has nothing left, with no hope and the next question come in their mind is “Why continue to live?”



Our government says jobs in Singapore increase but if I'm not wrong it is cater for those in the higher education like degree holder. How about those with little or no education?

To be honest, I belong to the latter.



As much I hate the inconvenience that suicide cause the commuters, but my heart goes out to the jumper.

Rest in peace..............
.

Today is my niece's 8 years old birthday.

If not for her illness she will be in primary 2 now,....studying, playing and running around with most other kids.

Doesn't matter.....we still LOVE her all the same.

Will not write much.


(My brother's house recently did a makeover. This is my nephew's room)


(Preparing the cake)


(My niece is really very anxious. She's beautiful)


(See how happy she was)


(My niece happy, everybody in the family even happier)

By the way, Melvin's son was born today. Same birthday as my niece.

Congratulation to Melvin for being a Father.
.

Zoe Tay out of Friday Weekly Top 10

It is confirmed Singapore's top actress Zoe Tay has lost favour with her fans. This year, she has fallen out of top 10 of the student paper Friday Weekly's annual Celebrity Popularity Poll. Sources say she is nowhere in the top 20.

Hoohaaa..

Which local celebrity do you hate the most?

My top 5 most hated celebrities..are they celebrity in the first place?
I don't know...I really don't know.

Coming at number 5 is...Bryan Wong.
I just don't like him. He have the sort of face you just feel like punching. No reason has to be given.

Number 4 is...Gurmit Singh
He is just plain disgusting. No talent in hosting. Know only how to scream. Only knows one liner, “Everybody scream.” Watching him hosting Singapore Idol was not painful but also unbearable.

Number 3 is... Dennis Chew
See him on TV, I switch to other channel immediately. Si buay act cute this fellow. His actions are like desperate man doing desperate thing in order become famous. I mean look at his face, not here not there.
How far can he go?

He thinks that just because he can speak mandarin makes them a good host? He look arrogant, act maichiam like a minihooligan.

Look, I swear to GOD....if he was my real brother, I disown him from the moment he was born.

Number 2 is...Zoe Tay
What I wanted to say about her already been said.

At number ONE is...Sharon AU
When I heard Sharon Au went to Japan, I prayed to the major five religion thanking them making my wish came true. Spare me not to hear her scream or shouting during variety shows. She totally don't know how to host ......only know how to scream, shout and being overly exaggerating.

Her mouth big, eyes narrow, acting so fake, do comedy not funny. She look like one desperately toad trying to keep her presence on TV felt. I almost wanted to smash my tv when I saw her hosting National Day two years back.

I wanted to write more things about her but I can't go on.......I just can't. The moment I think of her..my blood began to boil, my hand trembling.

Last words before I sign off.

Sharon Au....really SI BUAY AU
.

SINGAPORE : The SBS Transit has placed signs at 100 selected bus stops across Singapore, encouraging passengers to flag the bus early.

This will help bus captains stop at a timely manner and to ensure a smoother and safer ride for those onboard.

The operator has launched the public education campaign after receiving complaints that bus captains drove off from bus stops without picking up passengers.

Its subsequent investigations found that many commuters missed the bus because they often flagged too late.

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/237157/1/.html
-------------------------------

It's commuters fault again.
Everything is our fault.

Last fare hike was our fault because they say the some commuters underpaid bus fare by therefore they need to install EZ link card system to avoid cheaters.

And now this!
Who is this “elite”that came out with this campaign?
.

Since I wrote about the first person ever like couple of days back, I thought of my childhood.

So now is my childhood in primary school

I grew up watching He-man, Transformers, Mickey Mouse, Sesame Street . Not to forget, Ninja turtles and Smurfs too.

I lived near Outram...actually Jalan Kukoh to be exact and the block back then look like this.


I grew up brushing your teeth with a mug in Primary school during recess time. I will squat by a drain with all my classmates. The teachers said I must brush each side 10 times too.

Water bottles were slung around my neck and a must everywhere I go.

In class, we fight rubber to see how my rubber go on top the other.

I still remember there's this electronic hand-held game called "Octopus" which I always played.

I freak out when the teacher tells me to line up according to height and hold hands with the girl.

Near my house, market look like this


I get the option to have 1 packet of milk everyday in school and my parents gives me money weekly to pay for the milk.

My mum used to bring us to Van Kleef Aquarium very often. This place never fail to light me up.

(Entrance fees were 30 cents for adults and 20 cents for children)

We played skipping ropes; zero-point, catching and bean bags during PE lessons.

I buy ice bag with favor like 10 cents each at provision store below my house. Just bite and twist.

My playground got rope to climb above, got sand, got swings, got see-saw, got merry-go-round, got a dragon thingy with roll of steps for me to climb up.

I lived near Singapore river and remember the scene exactly like the picture below.




I buy tidbits called Kaka (20 cents per pack) and that had a toy in it and it changes every week.

Handkerchiefs back then were a must for both genders

Apart from Van Kleef Aquarium, mum loves to bring her children to National Theatre for a visit.



My childhood in secondary school

I have pager, wor! Beep..beep. Who pages for Nick?

SBS buses used to be non-air conditioned. The bus seats are made of wood and the cushion is red! The big red bell gives a loud BEEP when pressed. There are colourful tickets for TIBS buses. The conductor will check for tickets by using a machine which punches a hole on the ticket.

Bus stop look like this


Watch my first movie at cinema was only $2.50, circle seat(upstair) was $3.50. Watch movie like Breakdance or Ghostbuster at below cinema.
(Capitol cinema)

(Lido cinema)

(Cathay cinema)

I read Hardy Boys, The Three Investigators and the Famous Five story books.

I catch fishes in the drain.

KFC used to be a high class restaurant that serve food in plates and let me use metal forks and knives.

Autograph books were loaded with "Best Wishes", "Forget Me Not", and small poems like "Bird fly high, hard to catch, Friends like you, hard to forget".

Famous Chinese singers were only Alan Tam and Leslie Cheung

Class monitors and prefects loved to say "You talk some more, I write your name ah!"

I brought every single book to school, even though there was one thing called the timetable.

Clifford piers look like this.



Some of the well known streets look like this







What fond memories!
...