I cannot help but write about him each time I met him. He never failed to 'amaze' me with his present conditions. He is the one, the only........Hock Soon.

After he bombarded my mobile phone weeks after weeks, I finally relented and meet him. It's not that I looked down on him (avoid meeting him) but just that it's the damn freaking same routine for the past 15 years.

And he is most BORING chap I ever knew. I'm sure you guys knew who is Siew Hui aka Amos, ya.

He's another clone of him but at least he provide some amusement value.

Itinerary for the past 15 years.

- Came over to my place (coffeeshop) and I will treat him for dinner and beer.

- After he finished his meals, he would watch TV

- As for me, I will be sitting at the coffeeshop watching my finger and toes nail grows.

- Occasionally, he would asked me some question BUT it the SAME set of fucking questions for the fucking long 15 years.
Si buay tu lan.

Goes something like this......

Hock Soon: How are you?

Me: Yeah

Hock Soon: You work in the same company

Me: Yeah

Hock Soon: No change of job?

Me: Yeah

Hock Soon: Still staying with your mom.

Me: Yeah

Even when I see him again tomorrow, he will asked me these sets of stupid question again. So how come I still try to entertained him?

Well, first of all he's my friends and also I never forget that he once (only one time ever) treated me a bowl of prawn noodle when I was flat in 1990, so much so that I have only a dollar with me back then. Although I have already repay many times his kindness, but if I avoid him totally becos he's poor or dull, it's gives me no credibility as a friend.

Anyway I believe the highest form of wisdom is kindness.



Look at him.....his half of his front teeth was so badly decayed that was literally broke into two. Yuck! And he's 1 month older than me, only.



Saw his plastic bag and when I open up guess what it was?



2 used empty bottles with more used plastic bag inside. What is he keeping all this? My goodness, like almost a garbage collector.



Working as a partime contractor, he got job available 3 days per week and he got about $45 per day which make about $135 a week. Everytimes I see him, I tried my best enlightening him.

But I learned that I can educate a fool, but I cannot make him think.

Also when I tease him on giving me a treat instead guess what?
He chunt pattern more than badminton.
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An excerpt from The Newspaper.

It's going to be a boy for Allan Wu and Wong Li-Lin. The celebrity couple, both 32, are expecting their second child around the end of February already have a year-old daughter, Sage Cadence.
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There is something I cannot stand that is celebrities naming their children weird name. I wrote about this in my blog 2 times already, ti bo?. Yeah, none of my freaking business? Well, I'm a “kaypoh” chap. It is so funny that these people give their children weird names like Sage.

Really, Lim Ah Lian sounds so much better than these kind of names. Sage? Sound like Great Sage, the monkey God. Since they are expecting their next child....maybe they should name Tianpeng Marshall aka Zhu Bajie. The whole family can play Journey to the West.

Being a kiasu Singapore, I also want to name my child fantastic name next time. If boy, I will name Dugu and girl will be Dongfang. Sound nice? I got this inspiration from the movie“ Dugu Wu Ti” and “Dong Fang Bu Bai” respectively.

Together as a family we can play swordsmen in the house with me as Xiong Ba(formidable n invincible)

My Sunday outing...........

Why am I covering her face? Is she ugly? No, in fact she's the prettiest gal I ever dated. No kidding. It's just to protect her identity and also she knew nothing about my blog. I'll do a short field report.....a very short one.

Time: 5:00pm
Pick her up and went to MT Faber for dinner.


(Was told dinner only starts at 6:00pm)


(Damn, she is gorgeous)

After dinner, took some pictures and proceed to Pasir Panjang whereby they have stretches of pubs along this area.


Yeah, your eyes is not playing trick....she is drinking MILK.

By the way, what happened to 'Angel'?

Well, we're no more together....just I have anticipated long ago. To be honest, it's actual exceeded my expectation.
.

It 's seems to be a growing trend that newspaper are frequency reporting blogs and featuring them in their articles. Blog is a personal diary that one writes online for their friends to see and the reporters love to publish it out in the news.

First, we have Xia Suay Xue, the midget. Later making the headline was the SPG's blog who pose herself nudes. Laggi best was the racist blog whereby 2 chaps was jailed. Recently, the so called Singapore's hottest blogger Dawn Yeo was in the news for denying that she has gone under the knife.

Anyway just to kaypoh abit, I saw before and after Dawn Yeo's photo and I'm very freaking sure she had plastic surgery before. Really, extreme overhaul makeover had reached new height.

I think the newspaper reporters have nothing to write about so they surf the internet for blogs to publish. I remember the last time when I met Melvin, he told me he gonna buy The Straits Times and read in the evening. He asked me if I read newspaper (Straits times).

At the point of time, I don't know whether to laugh. I told him I did but in actual fact I DO NOT read The STRAITS TIMES.

Reporters Without Borders (a virtual network of non-governmental organizations that monitors free expression violations worldwide and campaigns to defend journalists, writers and others who are persecuted for exercising their right to freedom of expression) has ranked Singapore 140th out of 166 countries for World Press Freedom Ranking in 2005

We are ranked 140th....my dear friends.

So why should I read our 140th newspaper?

How do I get daily dose of news?
From the internet......from the internet.
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The largest Crazy Horse Paris venue in the world, and the first in Asia, is set to open in Singapore in December 2005. The Crazy Horse Paris dance troupe, known for its topless female performers, arrived in Singapore Wednesday to launch the famous cabaret, as the prudish city-state tries to spice up its image and woo tourists.

Prices range from S$85 (with standard drink) to S$360 for half bottle of champagne.

I saw the girls and they are not pretty at all. Pay over eighty dollars to watch such this kind of quality? No wonder they offer drink at Crazy Horse, after a few drinks, every ugly women would become beautiful.

Oh yeah, before I forgot, the main point is that they offer their neh nehs on the stage. But who wants to pay good money to watch tits bouncing on stage from afar when they can do so in the front seat on the Internet.

Nan, it's not gonna to work, I say.

In order to lure audiences, may I suggest they should implement private dances. The dancer perform just for you in a private room. Of course, she get free "massage" from you during her dance routine lah.

The Ladies: Gorgeous, sexy and aggressive.
Skin Factor: Topless, of course.
Dances: Lap dance: $20 (1 song)
Music: Whatever.

Buy 5 songs, get 1 free. The more you buy the more you saves, like the Singapore sales.

Sure hit number one spot in the entertainment industries, if have in Singapore. I tried it in Australia, it's rock!
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Haven't been updating for a while, been very busy with my work. I work in this company for almost 5 years and this month I broke my own record of number of ships I attended.

Average ships in one month is about 10, while the highest ever ship I attended is 15. And this month I took care of 18 ships. (My colleague handled just as much)

Now time is 9:40am,as I'm writing this, I got a 3 ships today.

First ship arriving at 1:30pm follow by another vessel at 6:00pm and last vessel coming in is midnight.

Tough?

Next week should be free, will update regular.
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November is busy month for my family. 3 members of my family is having birthday this month. Now it's my nephew's birthday.

All the same, nothing new to write.

Like my niece's birthday, we're celebrating at my brother's place.


(His actual birthday is not today)

But, I learned my nephew know how to sing another version of spider man's song.

Listen to this. Click here
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Last night, I stumbled upon the shooting of a bollywood film at Clifford piers when I was there about midnight. Ya, right ship like to come in the wee hours. The one of the actor was wearing Matrix Neo plastic costume with heavy duty fans blowing at him making him look cool.

Cool?

He looked like an idiot to him, though. So I whipped put my mobile phone and snap!



Then this Indian lady came along with walkie talkie asking me NOT to take pictures?

Lady: Cannot take picture here (With her head moving side to side)

Me: Why not? This is a public place?

Lady: Cannot.

Undoubtedly it take no genius to realize she's NOT a local and was working for Bollywood.

Me: You want called police for taking photo in a public place? (Challenging her)

Lady: Huh?

Me: You scare I take video and sell as pirated movie is it?

Lady: Huh?

Even some passerby was laughing at my remark and anyway seeing her embarrassed and I decided to move on. When you board launch at Clifford piers, you need to clear immigration checkpoint. I went in since she can't follow me in and I took pictures again.



Oh boy, seeing how helpless she was in stopping me, I felt good.
Yeah, I'm such a bad & nasty boy.
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Last week was like hell week for me. Like the NAVY SEALS in their fourth week of basic, mine begins on Wednesday and ended on Sunday.

During this period, everyday I attended at least a vessel. At times, three ships in a single day. That's why I have not update my blog for the past week.

I'm not going into details during this period, instead I will do a quick summary before my "hell week".

Saturday
Met up with Melvin for lunch.





You can see, he brought a digital camera for his Europe tour with his wife this coming December.

Then came Monday.


(Behind Bear is Lam's office)




(Eating mutton soup in a rundown coffeshop along Jalan Besar)

After dinner, three of us went to pub for a drink before looking for Toh for a chat. Long time never see Toh, liao.


(Toh commented Bear looked like a gay these days)


(That's Ah Toh on the right)




(Somewhere in Bishan)

Tuesday

Meet up with Roger


(Damn, he's one shy dude)


(What is he so afraid of? I don;t know. I really don't know)

After that, from Wednesday to Sunday....

My Hell week began.....
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Last night, Ah Lam, Angel and I went to Geylang, Singapore’s notorious red light district. Geylang is a heaven providing countless pleasurable hours to many.

No, we're not checking in some hotel 81 to do a threesome.

At Geylang, lust and passionately men may seek sexual pleasure but there another treasure over there. In Geylang, is also call food haven. Here, men either seek sexual craving or satisfy one's taste buds.

We made our pit-stop at Geylang Lorong 9. At this coffeeshop it's famous for their frog porridge. There about 30 odd tables of diners waiting for their regular fix of a pot of hot and spicy frog legs with the accompanying pot of light plain porridge. A scoop of the frog legs and kungpo sauce mixed into the porridge will send you to the summit.


(Angel in black)

Surprisingly, there were plenty of empty tables. Order 6 frogs and a pot of plain porridge to go along. Freshly slaughtered frogs were stripped to bone with minutes of arriving our table.


(It was so spicy that I drank 2 cans of coke)


(Lam is playing with his new mobile phone, Treo 650)

And poor Kermit...his bones was scattered all over table.


(I blur off, Angel's face.)

The frogs could not rest in peace and was humiliated further. Angel was feeding some stray cats using leftover bone on the table. Hahahaha


(Feeding stray cats)


(Ah Lam looking with joy seeing how the bone was devour completely by cats. My suspicious of him as pervert was true after all)



(Heard that after eating frog leg porridge, gave one's urge to “mate”)

Feel the heat and the beat eating smooth porridge with fresh frog legs, served in claypot along neon-lit of Geylang road is simply fantastic!

Ques: What do you call a frog with legs?
Ans: Dinner.
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I was roaming around International Plaza after lunch with a colleague and I'm exhausted by just looking at those babes especially ladies wearing office wear.

Nearly 2 females to 1 male.

Talking about office clothes, every morning when I take the lift up to my office, I see guys wearing a nice shirt with tie or some even in business suit. Ladies mostly wear pantsuits or dress with shirt to go along. Everybody is dressed in tidy, neat and like uniforms.

I'm the only chap wearing old t-shirt, jean and my converse shoes.

Back to the main topic, see those red big 2 vans?


(2 bread vans)

They are giving free breads with different favor. I saw people accelerating past me like they were running from a terrorists attack. They rushed to cross the road as if their existent in life depend on it. I walked over there just to see how our fellow Singaporeans would react in getting freebies.

I walked over, I saw, I felt ashamed.

Singaporean have no etiquette when collecting free items whatsoever. The guys giving out free bread said shouted, “One per person only.”

What do WE, the Singaporean do?

Everybody grabbed as much much their 2 hands can carry.

You need evidence?
Take a look below



The lady in white, just her right hand is hold 3 loaves of bread. Her kiasuism is second to none. I must say, she is REALLY.....

The best of the best.
Cream of the crop.

Being a cheapo myself, I also must grab.


(My office desk)

See the picture above?

Between my pc and telephone, what do you see?

My bread.
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This may be imaginary scenario but it may become a reality in the future. Seriously, I'm not kidding.

Location: Singapore prison.

I was sentence for 6 years imprisonment for manslaughter. Life in prison was tough, no doubt about it. Been looking forward for my release and was eager to meet up my family and friends. Just after one months for doing time, surprisely I saw Stephanie in prison too.

Me: Stephanie, what are you doing here? (Looking dumbfound)

Stephanie: Ah Nick....what are you doing here?

Me: Ah...killing someone. You?

Stephanie: I'm in this place because I just kicked a cat.

Then I saw, Ah Bear as I walk back my cell.

Me: Hey Bear! I'm here because of manslaughter.

Bear: I know already lah. Got hear news one.

Me: Then you came in for what?

Bear: I am in jail because I download MP3 online.

After lunch, I saw Rachel walking past me.

Me: Wow, you're in prison too!

Rachel: I heard you kill someone.

Me: Ya...long story. You leh?

Rachel: (Sigh) In jail because I wrote some racist remarks on my blog.

Me: Wah lau, like this also can.

Rachel: This is nothing actually.

Me: Still nothing?

Rachel: See that guy over there?

Me: (Looking over her direction) Huh? Isn't that Melvin?

Rachel: Yes, it him alright.

Me: Melvin, he is in prison too? (Looking bewildered)

Rachel: I talked to him this morning and he's here because he underpaid 20 cents on the bus.
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We're celebrating my niece's birthday today. Her actual birthday fall on the 27 Oct and she will be 7 years old. Will not write much as this entry will be photoblog.

Some pics is small, as I accidental set my cam to 160 x 120.










(I think my nephew inspiration was to be a hair stylist)


(After effect. By the way, don't stare at my groin area. It's because of my bermudas zip that made me look "big". In truth I’m very well endowed right down there.)




(Jo, he always inspirate to be spiderman instead)

I was in Orchard Road and this place was infested of young surveyors bothering you. I'm sure you would have encountered some girls approaching you with a notepad, "Sir, are you a Singaporean?"

This is usually followed by some other senseless questions if you choose to entertain them.

Their silly tactics will be asking you to draw a lucky draw coupon and pretend that you've "won" something and the idiot girl will jump up and down yelling, screaming “you've won!” as if you struck 4D. Then call a supervisor over and he or she will be equally excited, then invite you over to their stupid talk.

In order just to claim the prize, you have to attend a 3 hours talk which you have to fill up a form including your credit card. They tell you if you have credit card you get more freebies. In reality, they knew you're carrying credit cards so even you have no cash to buy for their plan, they will “force” you to sign the dotted line using credit cards instead.

This is a timeshare company, I'm talking about my friends.

I have kanna twice which I listened to their talk however in both occasion I got their free gifts.

What timeshare plan? I don't know.

What free gifts? This, I know.
(I know, I'm a cheap Charlie at times)

I learn how to avoid these pests using the following tactics. If they about to approach you,

A) Put on 'buay song' look, like wanted to pick a fight. They will think twice before approaching. Remember never, ever smile at them even they're are extremely pretty, not only it would be cruel to give them false hope but it also contradicting yourself.

B) Or you can scratch your groin area and grin at them like horny old man.

When all failed, is not lost yet. I have personal tried this and it work!

Girl: Sir, are you available for a quick survey? Only take a few minutes.

Me: Yes, why not (Stare at her breasts).

Girl: "Sir, are you a Singaporean?"

Me: Yes (Stare at her breasts and breathing heavily like Darth Vader.)

Girl: Do you like traveling?

Me: I like places with BIG mountains so to speak. (Still staring at her breast and breathing like Darth Vader at the same time “Slurp” “Slurp”)

Next thing I knew, she gone.

Why so hard of these kids? The thing is we should discourage them from talking of these surveying jobs. They should work in Macdonald, not some scam job.
.

Please read The Straits Times, there was this man who wrote in.

-----------------------
Excerpt:

Oct 21, 2005
Man overcharged four times in 10 bus rides

It is clear that the Government is on the side of transport operators as nothing was mentioned of penalties for the operators should they persistently overcharge a commuter.

I have been on the receiving end of regular overcharging on SBS Transit bus No. 147 for at least two years.

I have not claimed a cent as it does not make sense for me to travel one hour and spend $1.20 to claim just 20 cents.

Last week I decided to diligently monitor the fare charged for my trip to and from work and I found that out of 10 trips on Bus 147, I was overcharged for four trips, mainly the trip home.

This means that the error rate is 40 per cent, at least in my case. In such an instance, I think the bus operator should be penalized. I fully support Dr Lim Boon Hee's call to the Government to rein in bus firms that overcharge (ST, Oct 19).

I have since accessed SBS Transit's website three times to file my complaints and claims over the overcharging.

It has been a week since I made my first complaint and claim but I have yet to receive a reply from SBS Transit, not to mention the refund.

-----------------------

See what I mean? As I mentioned in my blog before, if commuters can be fined and jailed so heavily, what about the transport companies themselves when fares are deducted falsely?

How come there is no law to punish the transport companies for overcharging? Forgive my ignorance, which countries do you find laws which promises to fine or jail for fare cheats?

The idea of jail term on fare cheat makes my blood boil!

First, the design of the EZ link system to begin with was flawed and we get punish for their freaking flaws. Outrageous!

Revert back to bus conductors is better, lah.

We have lot of paper smart thinkers/scholars but very few practical solution providers. The typical solution is always fine and jail term. I can see our Changi prison will be expanding very soon.

You folks ask yourself, if there ever a chance and choice will you be a stayer or a quitter?
.

Our meal today was in a Japanese restaurant, safely settled in our seat , here in Parkway Parade, I've met up with Rachel. Her birthday was 3 days ago, so it was pretty obvious I should treat her a nice meal on top of my present for her since I'm late.


(Wearing spec, what a turn on...hahah)

How long I haven't seen her? A couple of months, I suppose.


(As usual, women like to be in charge of food)

As usual, she is in a very chatty and lively mood. She query me about my girlfriend, Angel and I pry into her personal affairs like her current boyfriend. Hey, I'm so glad her boyfriend is sincere and treats her well, otherwise I send my 2 Jack Russels to assault him.

(By the way, I was known as papa by the 2 dogs. Angel always said to the dogs," go to papa" hahaha)

You guys know what did I buy for her?


(Wrap nicely in a box)



Not ordinary name card holder.........it's from a Louis Vuittion.

Yesterday, I went in a LV boutique, spend just five minutes browsing the items and I chose it in another 5 min. Asked for the price, the salesperson took a catalog a record collection and said, “Sirs, it's $375”

Just a name card holder and costs me a freaking $375? Oh boy, just one word folks,......”STREAM!” with a capital S. After hearing the price, it's got me so excited and I could feel myself getting wet and my penis head was bigger than my own head.

After 1 min of silence, I finally said....

Me: Wrap it up (with style)
Saleperson: Credit card or cash?
Me: Card.
Saleperson: Present? I wrap it for you.
Me: Can just give me just this item and forget about the wrapping, can cheaper?
Saleperson: @-@

Anyway, back to the meal......


(Yum yum)


(Rachel was asking me what I want to eat)


(I turned off the sound)

After dinner, we went for a drink to engage in small talk before sending her back to her boyfriend's house.


(Can see, she's tired)



All along after our breakup, I felt somewhat guilt for reasons unknown but after tonight knowing she is well taken care of , it's get off my chest. I'm finally relieved.
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