You know one of the things I hate most?

Is that I have to attend ship right after work! That's right, I have a ship at 5:00pm today.

Imagine having worked from 8:30am (actually I arrives at office after 9:00am) to 5:00pm and then attended the vessel that will end almost midnight. So since it won’t be till wee hours, naturally I have to back in office tomorrow morning.
It sucks!

By the way, this is my 1st ship in 2 weeks, pathetic.

After lunch, Stephanie called. So I met her for coffee/tea break.

Once she taken her seat, she stared at me and her eyes opened her eyes wide.

Ok, my little suntan worked, I thought.
I must look like a hunk, I reckoned.


After listening to her, I was devastated

She told me I have a lot of gray hair.

Darn!
Folks, I’m having serious middle age crisis.

Luck was on my side, before I can say anything…………

Her phone rang.

Time: 11:00PM

After attending my vessel, I couldn’t believe this.
It’s 11pm at night and yet CTE was jam.

Yes, jam with the capital J

Damn, this jam causes me to reach me almost mid-night.

I went out with Rachel to watch the movie “White chick”
Wow, I watched 2 movies in a single week.
Err..quite a feat, I suppose.
(Consider the fact an average a movie per month)

Incidentally, my record is watching 2 shows in a single day. That was in my younger day then.
If I were to do that now, probably I will get muscles aches/stiff neck due to my age.

We still got almost 2 hours before the show starts so it is pretty obvious Rachel made use of this opportunity to browse around.



2 half boiled eggs, that yummy!

It was a long time since I had eggs. I love eggs.
In fact I love anything that are either round or oval shape. Get the hint?

Now talked about the movie “White chick”

This movie plot is two black FBI agents go undercover to protect hotel heiresses the Wilson sisters from a kidnapping plot. However, they accidentally injure the sisters, forcing them to cancel plans for a fashion show they were to attend.
To avoid trouble, 2 black FBI agents dress up as the Wilson sisters.

It is one of the funniest movies I have seen in a long time. I mean, laugh out loud humour.
It's a humorous exciting movie that will make you forget your problems for an hour and a half.

If you sit back and just let it happen without a critical analysis of reality you will have a good time watching this movie.

If you are down with your last $8:50, my advise go for it. Highly entertaining.

Oh boy, I’m not working today.
That’s four days in a row.
Just 1 word, shiok.

12:45pm: Met up with Bear at Harbour Front as we are on a mission.
A mission that required shedding our clothes.

Yes, we are going suntan at Sentosa beach.
We needed to keep ourselves fit (swimming) and also look good on our body.

Why are we doing this only now?
Well, as we reached middle age so our broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

Time: 1:15pm.
Loc: Sentosa

We headed straight for beach and after much walking we found a good spot.
We settled ourselves quickly.

Bear first thing he did was to scan around the places for chicks.

Yeah, he was that busy.

Finally, he got himself into relax mode.


Don't be fooled as if he was busy reading the newspaper. In fact his eyes were constantly on the lookout for any bikini girls that may walked pass us.

I swear I saw Bear’s nose bleeds when there was this buxom gal in bikini walked past him.

How about me?
In my mind, I was raping every one of them. Hahah

You know what’s the best thing in life?

Drinking a very cold beer, while relaxing in the sun.

I can’t think of anything better than this……
Actually that was the 2nd best thing in life.

The best thing is having an orgasm. Common you people, admit it.
(Maybe winning lottery is better)

We packed up at 4:30pm, took our shower and headed to the monorail ride.
Bear last time here was about 2 years ago.

It’s no wonder that he was thrilled and ecstatic.

Bear was pointing below where the some gals were playing volleyball.
He said, “We have better view up here”

Look at us, if both of us combined our age, we would become grandpa, liao

But, boys just wanted have fun……

My last day of my leave.

Nothing much.
Stay at home, watch vcd.

My second day of my three days leave.

Time: 12.30pm - Met up with Bear at Plaza Singapore to watch the movie Dodgeball.

Since it is still early we went to eat lunch at Cartel. It offered $9.50 for a set lunch including soup & drink.

Bear investigating the menu.

The show began at 2:05pm


The show is about owner and proprietor (Peter) of Average Joe's gym, is threatened by closure due to defaulting on his mortgage. Meanwhile, his arch-rival, is posed to buy out the gym in order to expand his gym empire.

To raise the $50,000 to recover the mortgage in thirty days, Peter and his group of misfit teams enter a Dodgeball tournament.

Overall, the show offered a full-hearted laughs.

What spoilt my fun was this stupid this teen student in uniform & his girlfriend were sitting behind us.
Were they watching quietly?

No.
They were chatting and playing in the cinema.

That's fine with me; however the guy kicked on seat several times. You know how annoyed it was?
That does it…..I turned around and chided him off.

He offered his apologized.

After some times, he did it again.

I turned around and responded by saying, “You won’t be playing when you see me using your testicles as ping pong balls.”

Nodded with understanding, he moved to another seats with his gal.

Sometimes violent is the only solution.

After the show we walked towards Orchards road.(HMV/Taka/Wisma)
All along these places….I was impressive by Bear, the Mr. Valentino.

Spotted him chatting with sales gal.


He got her mobile number.

So if a person were to sit like a living Buddha, he will never know any gal. Effort must be invested and Bear did the right thing.
By the way the only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen (Laying egg)

We went to Glutton’s square at Orchard Road for dinner.

Neither myself nor Bear have eaten here before.

I just love eating at the open space concept…

Clearly and surely Bear is enjoying his food.

This is the first day of my three days leave.

Woke up at 11:00am and I left the house at 11:55am.
I’m going to JB for some shopping. Yea.
Why going to JB?
Well, I was looking at my passport; pages not stamp for a long time indicate I probably needed the trip.

Unfortunately Bear is having his interview at 4:00pm therefore he cannot join me.

I took bus/mrt and reached Woodland checkpoint at 12:45pm and that was pretty fast, I thought.

At 1:10pm, touch down on Johor Baru.


As a smoker, first thing is to buy a pack of cigarettes.
Damage RM6.50/- ($4.20)
Singapore cost $9.50, exchange rate is 2.24.
CHEAP!

Then next thing in my mind was eat! I didn’t eat anything yet and I was total famished.
I don't mind going an empty stomach provided it isn't my own.

Found myself a small coffee shop where they serve only bak ku teh.
Unlike Singapore, there the bak ku teh have combination of pork meats.

Me order a claypot bak tu teh.

It was out of this world. Yummy.
Damage RM9.50/- including a can of coke.

After lunch, I went to JB City Square just a stone throw away.
The place is almost as big as Taka (Singapore) and the place was packed with shoppers.
Most of the brands they have is different from ours.
I shop until 3:05pm.

I just found out that they offer a free shuttle bus from City square to Plaza Pelangi to Pelangi Leisure mall at interval of 1 hour.
I missed the free shuttle bus so I took public bus instead to Plaza Pelangi as I don't like to wait.

Boarded the bus after a lady told me this is the correct bus.
Yeah, I using my charm as usual.

I noticed there a waste paper basket every 2 seats away.

After 25 min gone, still not reached. I realized I missed it.
Alighted the bus, took a cab….after 25 min of waiting….shit.
It was freaking hot. Experience is a wonderful thing.
It enables me to recognize a mistake when I make it again. Hahaha
Damage RM9.00/- for they taxi fare (I think I’m being con)

Lucky for the taxi chap, if he were in Singapore I’ll be using his testicles as ping-pong balls.

Reached Plaza Pelangi at 4:40pm…..finally. Thank God!

The decoration is for the coming moon cakes festive.

The place there is not as crowded as city square. Not much to see in fact.
What time is it? It’s tea break time.

Went to this restaurant called “Rock on the Grillstone”

The concept was the foods were served on top of a very hot stone.
Sound cool, ya.

Order a Rib-eye steak and I was given a raw large steak.

See they serve the beef on the hot stone.

So if you wanted rare or medium, just cut into small pieces and let it ‘burn’ on the stone longer.
Damage RM28.00/- including ice-lemon tea.

After that I took the free shuttle bus to Pelangi Leisure mall

It was a mistake.

Spend less than five minutes survey the place and I decided I have to go.
The place is like a ghost town.

Took a cab back to City Square for a hair cut.
RM28.00/- for cut and wash and brought an L’Oreal shampoo after the hairstylist recommended me.
Total damage RM65.00/-

Time check: It almost 7:00pm
Time for dinner……

Went around and found these roadside stalls which stretch about 100m long.

The atmosphere is absolute fabulous.

Order some mutton bones steak.

They even provided you with a straw for sucking up bones juice.
See the straw on the right sticking out of the bone?
Damage RM5.00/-

After that I made my way back home and I reached home at 9:00pm.

Total damage RM120.00/- for the day including misc like some magazines I brought.
What a great day!

Just watched the finale of the Amazing race, Chip and Kim won!
Yipee! (I always wanted them to win)

My manager asked to me clear my leave again.
Sure since there is no ships for the whole weeks.

So I took this coming Wed, Thur & Friday.
What will I be doing?

No idea, actually.
Doing housework?
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Well, I think of something……to do.

Today a salesman came up to me during lunchtime to sell me something I don’t need.
I politely turn down his good ‘offer’

Like every salesperson, he was very persistent.
He kept talking, while I kept eating.

Still, I said no and told him not to waste his time.
Did he get the message?

Oh no…apparently we are not on the same planet.
He kept on talking, in fact he getting quite sarcastic.

Finally I said, “I know Karate, Kung Fu, Judo and 20 other dangerous words."

On my way to meet Bear, it was pouring down rain.
I always love rain cos it bring life.
On top of that, it offered me a free car wash as well.

I wonder why traffic was so light?

Barely any cars were spotted for the next few minutes.
Must be the high petrol pricing here that's why people are staying at home.

Well look on the bright side, the government raised taxation on petrol is to help the environment; problems caused by burning too many fossil fuels.
What a great justification!

Picked up Bear and we went to Gourmet Festival at Suntec Convention Center to test our taste buds.
Upon stepping in, it similar to a wet market.

All I can see is people…….and more people.

Bear beckoned me over to that stall.

$2 a bowl for soup…….let’s try.
Conclusion....yuck!
Drink campbell soup tastes much better.

We walked past a stalls selling kueh.
Look at the varieties of colour that they have.

But looks can be deceiving.

I tries several other foods but to my disappointment, it nothing to shout about.
Basically the foods there are mostly local.

The bad thing about the place is there tables & chairs is not enough.

There is technique in getting a place though.
If you spotted a table with 1 or 2 persons (assuming the rest went are queuing up or whatever) you pop over and sat down.

I find that it is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
A conscience won’t be hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

Anyway, bear & myself ended up in a hidden corner to sample some foods.

Don’t ask me why.
I'm planning to be more spontaneous in the future.

Bear is doing his little magic stunt again.

What more I can say about him except Mr.Valentino is at work.

Currently old Veg is taking his taxi license and that's the symptom of middle age.
Getting a taxi license is one way to ensure one’s survive if were out of job.

What can we do?

Welcome to the real world, in this little red dot.

But there are better alternative.

I just watched the news and there some changes have just been suggested for spas and massage parlours in Singapore. These are just some of the changes that the advisory panel has recommended.

It may allow a woman be massaged by a man.

Wah lau…..good news.

No, I’m not referring to those pregnant massage or foot massages.

I was thinking more of the spa types or do they have breast enlargement massage?
Now I can get license to legally molest women. What a lovely job….

For the first time, I know how entrepreneur feel when they talk about having passion for their business.
I felt in me as well.

Somebody please tells me where to apply the massage course/license?

I wonder why some people always have the habit of making you want to tear your hair out.

Damn, it so annoying.
Who else?
Some freaking dudes that I worked with.

I’ll shall keep their identity a secret.

Yeah right, if they happen to read this I will come out from their monitor screen and bitch slaps them silly.

Ok….enough of my whining.

Today there is announcement in Parkway informing us to evacuate building.
Couple of weeks back, we just had our annual fire drill so this must be the real thing, I thought

To make the matter worst, my manager was ranting fire fire.
Flashback scene from 911 came into my mind.
Fuxx, I am in deep shit.

By the time a minute gone by, half had already vacated the office.
3 minutes later, I was still in the office.

I couldn’t decide whether I evacuate or go to toilet first for ‘making cake’.(Urgent)
The more I think, the more I couldn’t think.

Fortunately it turned out it a false alarm.

Saturday is beach day. Yeah!

Bear & I went down East Coast Park to have some serious sun tanning.
Why we got the idea in our head? Where did it come from?

Oh you see, Bear wanted to be dark & tan.
(As usual, I’m putting everything on bear again)

He is sick for having such a fair complexion all the time and if he got any paler than he already has, people might mistake him as albino.

1:30pm – Reach East Coast Park.
We looked for a suitable place and Bear wanted a more seclusion place.
Whereas I wanted a more crowded place which I can feast my eyes on some babes in bikini.

He won this time.

Look at his enthusiasm as he led the way.


(All smiles, nothing but smiles)

He settled for a place and I did a head count, it less than 10 persons around in a radius of 20m.
Come on it a Saturday……where are the bikini chicks?
Here, things don’t look too good.

Bear rubbed some salt to my wound as he said that there will be not much people around this area.

Before he could finished talking, he swiftly transformed.

I realized why he desired for a quiet spot.

He wore only underwear. Is swimming trunks no longer the ‘in’ thing around here?

I just put on my short, it’s blazing hot, and I’m going to roast!
I put on my sunscreen and I knew my skin gonna crisp up like an overcooked potatoes and fall off!

After half an hour, Bear checked on his body.

No result.

After hanging out in the sun for an hour, I can’t think.
That right, I’m baking my brain as well.

4:30pm – Thank goodness, it packed up time.

There is a fine line between sun tannings and lie there roasting like a pig.
If I were to expose to the sun any longer, my testicles will become roasted chestnuts.

After that, Bear went back to my place with me.

8:00pm – Old Veg came to my place and use my computer.

He’s taking his taxi trial exam online.

(Old Veg & Bear in deep discussion)

It seemed Bear also interested in becoming a taxi-driver as well.

You know something?

You know you are in the Middle age...when you tries to get your taxi license in case of future needs.

I think I need to get myself a licence liao.

Old veg is doing his questionnaire.

Bear reading his playboy magazine and gee, he looked like a red brick.

As for me, my skins are both painful and itchy.
But I thought that I looked sexier. haha

After that, three of us watched soccer match together till midnight and drank ourselves silly.

What a nice way to end our night.

What’s so good about today was I have a ship at 10:30am, not 10:30pm. YES!
I managed to finish my work at 3:00pm sharp.

Bear was at Clifford piers, waiting for me.
He is free because he still jobless.

Together we went to old veg’s wife (Karen) working place (WTC) to pick pots of flowers as promise.
I learned something today.
A friend in need is a friend should be avoided.

3:30pm - There she was standing at the taxi stand waiting for us.
I only met her twice.
One was her wedding and other time was somewhere 2 years back.

What dawn on me was her facial,she resembles her husband, old veg.
I think this is what people said about couples having similar facial features after spending a lot time together.


Look like old veg? Oh my God!
(I think I’m going to be her wrong number that wakes her at 3:00am.) Hahaha

I motioned her to put the pots of flower behind my van but she replies, “I put in front better as the flowers not easier fall.”

Obviously she mistook my perfectly understandable Mandarin for some alien code and I was forced to simplify my instruction which was surprisingly compliant with ease.

Having secured the plants at the back of my van, I released the choke-hold I had on her and returned to my seat.

She then offered me a drink to appease me.

Then she gone…..like the wind.

Err……did I did something wrong?

4:10pm - Great World.
Bear wanted to buy something at Great World.
Sure, I thought what it was, until……

Did you see what it was? It’s sweet!
Now I know why Bear is gaining all that lard.

5:45pm – Along the way, the orchard flowers was put to the extreme test.
It was turned over as I did a sudden brake test.
It was rolled to and fro as I did U-turn test.

Bear holding one of the plants.

It’s clearly show the flowers began to withers.

I'm not being insensitive, I just don't care:)
(PS: I know Karen is reading)

Today Old Veg’s wife called me up and seeks my help.

Requested me to over her working place today, picks some pots with plants & deliver to her house.
As a helpful person, I told her no problem.

When she revealed her master plan, I freaked out.

Apparently, she suffer from insanity, she enjoys every minute of it.

She wants me to go over her working place, picks up 3 pot of plants and deliver to her house and leave it at her door step……..all by myself. (She will not accompany me)

Yo ma ma, do I look like a walking courier chap?
She has just found a new enemy.

Another thing, my manager today asked me to take clear my leaves.
So I took this Thur & Fri as his request.

So what I will be doing these 2 days?

The more I think, the more irritate I get.
The more irritate I get, the more desperate I got.

Then I remembered desperation leads to strange behavior.

Suddenly, I found a solution what I’m going do.

Onto each week, a Monday must come.
Shit, another Monday again!

These words were on my cupboard when I was in N.S reminding me another tough week ahead.

Like I said, if I had to go through another 2 years of National Services, I probably would commit suicide by using a bean curd to smash my head.

As promised, I would shed some light on Chevial.

Some ques & ans session, shall we?

Who is Chevial?
Well, she is a gal I used to go out with for about 8 months before I knew Rachel.

My friends had seen her before?
Yeah, the late Eric, Melvin, Bear and my colleagues.

Why I afraid to met her? (The CD Shop)
I was just avoiding her.

Why I am avoiding her?
Err…..next question please.

Do I still keep contacting with her?
No….but she did sms me this year.

When the last time I went out with her?
1 month after I met Rachel.

Were we actually together?
Nope, that the truth.

Tell us more about her.

First, I thought she quite pretty and she is in her mid 20s who goes loves clubbing, likes get drunk & stay out late very often (almost every night). Basically she just likes to have fun & enjoy almost every night.

There are plenty of those mid 20s gals falling under this category, these days.

I’m not kidding, when we goes out…50% guys would approached her to ask for her number.
Yeah, she is that hot!

Do we still keep in contact?
Out of sight is out of mind, you say leh.

What I think of her?
Ok…..here goes.

I think beside "party all the time" there are always better and more meaningful things to do.

Unfortunately this category of gals doesn't know how to appreciate a normal and simple life. All they want is loud music, continues flow of beer. They never like to be solo and always hang around in groups.

Talk about parties, my friend Ping whom was divorce after 7 years of marriage….well his wife continues to be a party animal and finally his wife is seeing another man.

A man change never his skin.(A leopard never change it spot)

Think about it.

Woke up at 10am, it early by my standard.
I’m not working today, how I wish it could be every week.
Not possible, I know.

After sitting on my bed in deep meditation (yoga style), I attained enlightenment.
What if I change my job?
I’m so smart.

Bear called and we agreed to meet later.

Picked up him and off to Orchard.
Orchard road, where there are pretty girls gather.
Ah….there is life after all.
Life is indeed beautiful.

I parked my van at 10th Shaw house.
Gracious me, imagining how many rounds I have to turn.

We passed by the CD Shop where I heard this song ‘Sway’” which made us go in.
The salesgirls there were exceptional friendly. When I handled any cd, she would tell me to go over the CD player where they have to cd and I could listen to it.

Ok, I got the message.
Then I touched another one, guess what?
She tells the same thing.

Hmm…..I walked over another side, just about to pick up a particular cd; she appeared from nowhere and politely asked me to listen. I looked at Bear and Bear returned back the favor.
In order to have some peace both of us obedient obeyed her order.

Despite deprivation of browsing peacefully, I must really marvel at her own perseverance and determination.

Holy mama, is that customer service to the extreme or what!

After a while, I and bear went up 2nd level and the salesgirls followed us as well.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a stalker here.
Is there any peace around this place?
I am traumatized.

Guess who I saw?
I saw a Chevial working there. (The Cd Shop)
I saw, I turned, and I walked out.

Will talk about her later.

So went to Far East Plaza to look at Japanese wannabe teens.
Look at Bear, look at him.

He is at his best.....observing girls.
His eyes is like radar constantly scanning for target.

I don’t even know Bear was an avid reader of book.

On a closer inspection, I realized he was looking at female models promoting bras.

So….he’s a bra lover.
Gee..wise men think alike.
That make us two of the kind, ya

Look at this pic!


Apparently, Bear stared at her…..with the “can I molest u” looks.
She just trying to avoid eye contact, I guess.

Anyway, we end the night having mutton soup for dinner in Jalan Besar.
Just one words to description the soup….. excellent!

Something is bothering me, I need to come clean.
Here my confession.......

I’m sure most of my friends have received modify pictures of me like Spidernick or Old Veg in star wars……etc.

Well, it not done by me. Who is the person?
it's Melvin aka Jediman.

Melvin first sent to me with my face on a spiderman and then more and more.
In return, I sent to you guys.

Q: How he got the pictures to alter?
A: Go to my gallery and download.

Q: Why did he do it?
A: Cheap thrill, I suppose (I threaten to castrate him if he did not do it)

Actually the alter pictures is very nice and maybe I will post for everybody to see in my website.

I have to thank Jedimaster for his’ time & effort.

Now I had confessed, I felt so much better.
Now this is straightening out, let me whine a little, ok?

Did you watch Singapore Idol last night? Did you see Daphne’s performance?
I can’t believe she got in! I thought her performance simply awful and she has the most squeeky voice.
Frankly, I could not believe how the judges praised her.

Just to let you know that it is said that Daphne Khoo who happens to be local filmmaker Eric Khoo's niece.

And Eric Khoo is son of the richest man in Singapore, the late Khoo Teik Phuat.

Do the rich & powerful got to do anything with this?
You do your math.

Here what the Judges' comments.
--------------------
Dick said, “Thank goodness you came and made the show a bit lively and interesting"

My comments: Daphne just sounded like another tipsy female patron singing while drinking beer at a pub. Lively? Interesting? Sure…when she do a striptease act. Don't make my toes laugh
--------------------
Florence Lian said, “You are going to rock the Idol world"

My comments: Wei,Ah Lian you are a former DJ and failed completely as a judge. Your remarks are worthless, no constructive comments to offer and kept praising her like she is a superstar. Rock the idol world? U makes me wet.
--------------------
Douglas said, “You did blow me away"

My comments: You seemed like ass kissing to me, leh.
--------------------
Ken Lim said, ”You don't have the maturity to carry certain songs”

My comments: Bravo....the truth has spoken. I like this chap already.
--------------------


Next time, I gonna whack Christopher Lee, another overrated kid.

Oops, we did it again.
Last night, we quarrel for 2 hours, from 11:30pm to 1:30am
Yeah, I know…..2 hours can watch a movie liao.

Who the person?
Why or rather what did we argue about?

Ahem…let me sing a song….”I don’t wanna talk about it, how it broke my heart”

Maybe next time, I will put up in my diary.
Not now cos I'm grumpy.

Again, I'm asking somebody to give me a watermelon to smash.

After work, I met up Melvin at Funan Centre to view his pc table. He asked me along to give some comment. He was damn thrilled about his latest finding of his ideal table.

There, I could see his teeth not his eye cos he kept smiling along the way up the escalator to the three floors. He was walking in high-speed mode, while grinning from ear to ear.

I tell u, he was like a man in possessed.

Incidentally the shop was called V.Hive.


Melvin show me his ideal pc table….he knocked few times on the table and said, “Good wood one, you know”

Then he went around, the side and even under the table to check for flaws.


Boys & girls, I'm not kidding you, did I?

One word to describe him….. ”jialat”

Anyway, had to stop blogging as Rachel calling me now....